Heartbreaker for a Mom

Today I started "training" for a 5K. I am really pumped about this goal becase I KNOW I will be able to achieve it, and I think it will also be a challenge too.

Today was my most heartbreaking moment that I've experienced as a mom thus far. Grammie (Andy's grandmother) passed away on Monday. Tonight we told Emily that Grammie had passed away and gone to heaven to be with God. We told her that Grammie was very old and God wanted her to come to heaven to be with him. We knew that she was old enough to understand that Grammie was gone, but we really didn't think she would be affected by it.

Well, that girl cried. And cried and cried and cried. She curled up in Andy's lap and cried like I've never seen her cry before. She kept saying, "But I will miss Grammie so much. I can't do puzzles with her anymore." Then she said, "We need to tell Nan!" (Andy's mom...Grammie was her mom). We assured her that Nan already knew.

Thankfully I feel competent in this area thanks to my job, so I read her a book I had that explains what heaven is to children. She liked the thought of heaven, and stopepd crying. Well then she started crying all over again and said, "My Daddy died!" I told her that her Daddy didn't die, that he was fine. She said, "But he's old too!" She was so heartbroken, like she was realizing fort he first time the potential of loss. She asked me as we were saying her prayers before bed when Grammie was coming back from heaven. I explained that once you get to go to heaven to be with God you don't come back, because your life on Earth was done. That made her sad, but I'm trying to help her see that heaven is good and that we can be happy for Grammie that she is in heaven even though it makes US sad.

After lots of cuddling and reassuring, she felt better and could carry on. What an experience though...her grief was painful to watch and feel.